I want to see you be brave

Fear can be life changing or life saving. Fear can hold you back or push you into action. Fear has been a powerful force bossing my daughter around for far too long. I shared briefly over a year ago how we ended up in a courtroom to let a certain ex-boyfriend of Erin's know he was no longer permitted to harass, stalk or threaten her. Fourteen peaceful months ended last week when he walked into Subway. On Tuesday, he delivered her flowers to acknowledge her final day working there. Her color drained and she walked away from him. He later texted how much he couldn't resist reaching out one last time. Flowers and a single text after fourteen months does not warrant a protection order but shook us up. Greg wants to change course on his hunting plans this week. It's always stalker season, isn't it?

This young man entered Erin's life when she was too niave to know what she'd gotten herself into or how to escape. Three weeks into their relationship, she told CJ she didn't want to see him anymore because their life views were so vastly different. His response, we found out months later was to put a knife to his throat and threaten to kill himself if she left him. Our terrified daughter stayed. We immediately knew something wasn't right and tried reaching her. She pulled further and further away from us. We texted her when she was out with him. Her answers were always short and non committal. We later learned he'd put a password on her phone. She hadn't used it to retrieve text messages in weeks. All of her friends disappeared and when Greg walked upstairs one morning to the sound of her crying on the phone and heard CJ screaming obscenities at her, he took the phone and made it very clear he would not be permitted in Erin's life treating her so poorly. We wish we'd known the fullness of the situation earlier. Erin felt trapped and terrified.Our interference scaring her further. She truly believed he'd kill himself if she left him. No matter how many times we assured her suicidal boys are dead boys and this one was just manipulative, she says to this day she would feel responsible if she found out he'd finally done it.

Since that season of Erin's life, we've noted how distant she deliberately keeps people in her life. She has not dated since that relationship ended. All the friends in her life at the time betrayed her for nasty stories intended to destroy her reputation. They were circulated by CJ. If he couldn't have her, no one else would want her as promised. School became a nightmare she wanted desperately to escape. We seriously considered allowing her to live with my parents in Ohio for a fresh start but knew social media prevents anyone from truly starting over in this day and age.

So, as high school finally ended and college plans needed to be secured, Erin hid from life. She remained anonymous for months and her social life was pretty quiet. She will take college courses in January because we've convinced her she has no other choice in the matter. But today life took a turn for the better and Erin has a bounce in her step. A regular customer in Subway gave his card to Erin's manager and asked for Erin to come see him for an interview. He is the director of our local Child Protective Services office. He watched Erin battle stressful situations with a smile. He saw her interact with large groups of demanding school children with humor and grace. He noted that anyone can be trained to do a job but her personality for his line of work is tough to come by. But, he assumed Erin was 25! They talked at length today and he wants her to apply for a position on his team next week. If he can convince Human Resources to hire her at age 18, she will have her foot in the door in her career choice! If not, he wants her in school pursuing her degree and promises to keep in touch.

Erin went from seeing college as a waste of time to realizing in a matter of hours she needs it to make the difference in the world she wants to make. Erin has always maintained she wants to be the voice for the truly helpless. She's questioned her own judgement far too much since CJ entered her life. This man walking into her life today with no prior knowledge of her passions convinced her to pursue them and gave her hope. I can see it in her eyes.

The kids and I sing our hearts out when "Brave" is on the radio. Kate is learning the sign language to go along with it. I want to see my girls be brave. I want to see them willing to take chances when it comes to making a difference. I want to see them embrace the gifts God's given them and use them to make positive changes in the world.  I want to see them all be brave.

Tonight she is in orientation with Amazon. She chose to follow through with that plan since it only came about yesterday! Her final day at Subway was Tuesday. She landed a new job on Wednesday. She was offered a job with UPS as she left her Amazon interview with an offer and was pursued for yet another opportunity today! If CPS works out, she will leave Amazon but either way, college with a purpose will begin in a few months.