Nineteen

"Mary treasured these things and pondered them in her heart" Luke 2:19

I've been toying with this verse a lot this season. What mother cannot relate? In all of motherhood, from the birth of our baby to each trial they overcome or success they achieve, we feel deeply as though part of our hearts have the audacity to walk around outside our bodies. We keep these sweet memories tucked away and they often surface in moments unexpected. 

This week held Ryan's nineteenth birthday. I'm okay, just remembering the way he felt in my arms and his perfect little grip around Greg's pinky. At just shy of two pounds, he had no idea he was not in charge; therefore, would have fit in perfectly around here. 

Historically, our what ifs were born of sadness but we've crossed the threshold. It wasn't supposed to be. I trust God prevented our son a lifetime of pain. His death was mercy, even if it broke me. 

We've seen Lauren, Taylor and Austin for the last time in person until June 2024 when we fly to Hawaii to visit them. The hand life has dealt them lately has been bumpy at best. Lauren stayed near a friend in an extremely difficult position while she simultaneously managed a move, Christmas prep and a young sister in-law in serious condition this week. She also delivered a friend's baby in her car! She says she may have found her calling, minus the whole mess in the car part. She is a rock star.

Erin leaves for Africa at four in the morning on Christmas Day. We get to keep her cat. Sigh. Whereas we are incredibly proud of our kids, watching them soar is not without some trepidation. They are making their way in this crazy world. Without us. The nerve. 

Mary, the mother of our savior knew all too well the pain of watching her child serve a larger purpose. Thank God, literally, for His peace. 

Greg and I enjoyed a delightful night out with friends. This absolutely beat running errands and calling it a date. Chris and Kristin drove down to spend the night with us before we all boarded a dinner train in Bardstown, Kentucky. The two and a half hour meal was comfortable and delicious. The company was pretty sweet too.

Ty made pizelles for his girlfriend and I swiped several for coworkers. This is his favorite Christmas tradition and no one is mad about it. 

His life is so hard. Despite offering a variety of toys, no one played with him.

Erin brought Ada over to prepare her for the upcoming long stay. Diesel is really upset Ada doesn't want to play with him. 

Our hilarious grandson was counting days until Christmas on the calendar while video chatting with us. Once he was finished, he turned the page and commented, "then we all go to heaven because there are no more days." Bewildered, Lauren assured him it just meant they got a new calendar. I roared. Anyone else remember Y2K?

Our annual Christmas Light Scavenger Hunt challenge was canceled when the weather changed dramatically. We still video chatted with our friends while sipping hot cocoa. We may take our list out Christmas night since the day will be super low key here. But seriously, this cold front is anything but welcome. 

We spent the day without power (heat!) and battling a flare. It's been so long since I last had one, I believed at first I was getting the flu. I guess the upside is our Christmas Eve gathering doesn't have to be canceled. But for the love, it was a brutal day.