Just Another Day in Paradise

Lauren called Sunday morning to tell on Taylor for pulling her fingers. She did this because I threatened him with bodily harm if I caught him grabbing her fingers again after he dislocated one last year. He quickly took the phone and whined, "but Mom! She was poking me!" and I cracked up. They are adulting.

Erin sent us word Jake stated Moe's was better than Qdoba. She hates to tell us but this means he most likely isn't "the one". She is emailing the CEO of Tinder about their neglect in not including that particular question in their screening process.

Ty gave Makenna some driving advice because he is obviously an expert on the subject. "All you have to do is ride the brake down hills and watch for cars. It is just like riding a scooter."

Saturday night Kate called Greg a Butt. Name calling hasn't been Kate's style but we were bound to ruin her at some point. Anyway, Greg quickly responded by declaring that would make her a turd. Makenna burst out laughing and told her father he says one funny thing every couple of weeks so he should just be quiet for awhile.

I tried people. I really tried. I raised these children in church, with wholesome television and homemade food. I banned Sponge Bob and chef boy r dee. I checked all the good parenting boxes and yet I spend an awful lot of time wondering where it all went wrong.