Twas the Week Before Christmas......

Since the kids are staying at Taylor's dad's house, our visits are limited to a few hours every other day or so. We are embracing all the time we can. His sweet grin and happy disposition make the time fly. He is busy, to say the least but enjoying all the attention he has been showered upon him.

Kate begged for a Christmas cookie baking day, so I supplied ingredients and cleared an afternoon to accommodate. And then she chose to spend time with sisters instead. I suddenly envisioned an afternoon spent sipping tea and reading to best prepare for the eighteen we will be feeding tomorrow. Santa was likely not going to be impressed with our measly Christmas Eve offering but I know how little Santa actually needs to consume. But then Ty recalled my great Aunt Janet's pizzelles and jumped in to help. He made every last cookie.

Kristin and her family drove down to spend the day yesterday which was delightful and not photographed. Again. It was a great day full of laughter and love. Ethan upon hugging me goodbye asked if we would see each other again next Saturday too. I wish, Ethan. I wish.

Kate babysat for the first time officially on Friday night. Given the later hour, I went along to offer back-up if needed. She was a natural and it gave me the opportunity to pull out the camera that hasn't been seeing much love lately.

Kicking Off Christmas Break

When we woke Ty, his first groggy words informed us he wore clean clothes to bed so he would be ready to go this morning. And I smiled. At 4:45 in the morning, he was fully aware of what day we had planned.

While in Columbus, they wanted to visit the Cummins Power Store. Ty insisted he needed a lanyard to look like his dad. And then this is what he did with it.

He tells everyone about the root beer floats as big as his head in the old fashioned ice cream parlor. To insure we have room for dessert, we start with floats and share a kids' plate of chicken tenders. There is a reason we only drive to work with Greg once or twice a year. It isn't a healthy day, to say the least.  But we have a great time.

They reminded me they can be friends when left with no other option. Bickering was minimal, which is rare these days.

Our waitress this morning thanked us and said we were her best customers in five days. She was on the verge of tears as she said it, completely exhausted. In truth, we smiled and said thank you as she took care of us. We didn't do anything special but basic manners are so lacking that simple kindness was that appreciated. So some unsolicited advice? Be nice to your sales clerks, servers, package handlers and anyone else working their tails off this holiday season.

And speaking of sales clerks, Makenna and I ran an errand on Tuesday and an elderly woman after winking at me told Makenna word on the street had her on the naughty list. Makenna grinned, quickly assessing this was her kind of grandma. The clerk quickly added, "of course this means you've had more fun this year than the rest of us". As it turns out, she is my kind of grandma too.

Scavenger Hunt

We once again challenged our friends to a quick Christmas light scavenger hunt. I hosted one family with a crockpot full of rich and creamy hot chocolate while we video chatted with friends in Texas who were consuming the same indulgent recipe. Giggles, catching up on school related news and comments about who has grown and who was hunting in the best weather were exchanged among the kids before we all headed out with identical lists. After a quick forty minutes, as this is all we could collectively squeeze into an already full week, only ice skates remain and the first family to score a photo taken with them will be declared this year's victor. Since victory really wasn't our goal, we are content with the sweetness of the two year old tradition that brings us together virtually, if even for a moment.

While Kate held the checklist and sharpie, co-pilot and mostly in command, Ty bantered on as each statement starts with, "And guess what Mom...." over and over. But the boy who shrugs when asked about what he's learned in Sunday school or primary school for that matter suddenly had something to say. His understanding of the gospel is vast and I credit his Sunday school teacher for the lively way he teaches as Ty rarely engages when we talk about such things at home. As he has well documented when asked in Mother's Day surveys about me. What does your mom say? His reply? Every time? "Stuff". To be fair, when he rambles on about Star Wars or video games, I only hear "stuff" too.

The week holds the arrival of a little family from Texas and a day trip to Columbus, Indiana with Greg for me and the youngest kiddos. We are hosting friends on Saturday, celebrating a heavenly birthday on Thursday and Lord help me grocery shopping one last time on Friday before we spend Christmas Eve surrounded by loved ones for the entire day. The brunch menu is out of control, as is the turkey challenge a son-in-law launched against Greg; the brave boy. Kate still holds onto hope we will squeeze an afternoon of baking in on Sunday and some hopeful firefighters are too as we have promised sweet treats. Aren't they still sweet after Christmas, I ask as I process where the silent portion of this Silent Night is supposed to emerge? But lest you think it stops there, Ty has not forgotten the promised trip to supply blankets to the animal shelter either. We are simply running out of time and aren't areas of service still worthwhile in January? In my mind, they might be that much more so.

Honorary Family

Choosing to nominate Makenna as the adult in charge for our road trip was a wise decision. I sat in the back consuming a good book while she taunted her father with questionable music selections.

Ty looked at me as we were leaving the Baughman family Christmas and asked if Aunt Kristin was actually his aunt. And I explained she is one of several honorary aunts because she loves us unconditionally and has been a part of my life since long before his birth. And then we arrived at her home for dinner; a meal she and Chris prepared for us so we wouldn't have to grab fast food on the three hour drive home. Spending a few hours together after so many months was the decompression my heart needed that evening. The kids, Greg and I laughed more in that limited time at Kristin's than we had all day. Family extends beyond blood. Family is full of the people I choose and those who choose me, with all my flaws. I am blessed in the honorary family department and don't take that for granted. So to all my people, and you know who you are, thank you.

This past week my grandson found himself in timeout and couldn't believe it. That face! Good luck to his Momma!

Kate's winter concert Wednesday was full of holiday songs, most of which I had never heard. One brought tears to my eyes as it spoke of a winter lullaby for a baby who ultimately flies away from his mother's arms. It was beautiful.

And as we made our way out of the auditorium, she was hugged by former teachers, friends, parents of friends and I was struck by the encouragement and support she is creating in community for herself.

Ty, the Pro

Ty has been talking the last few days about the world his friend wants him to build for her. This girl insists she wants a giant pink house with a large swimming pool and a water slide. Ty has been planning and processing how to make all her Minecraft dreams come true. He has lamented his limited "resources" and how he can gather more. My first thoughts were in awe of the little girl who has him willing to work so hard for her and then a little concerned he may be a pushover when it comes to pretty girls, even though evidence at home indicates I have nothing to fear. Ahem. Anyway, today at lunch, my little engineer was still contemplating how to provide all she desires and then allowed me in on a secret, "I will make her a big pink house but she won't be able to walk to the door. I am making it a parkour and she will have to jump over landmines to get into her house."

Since it is often dark by five o'clock each evening, we often play games to pass the few hours between dinner and bedtime. Ty loves Uno the most followed by bowling on the Wii. Tonight Greg and I challenged him to a game to prevent further taunting of his sister and her friend. As he realized how close he was to becoming a pro bowler, he was determined to achieve that status tonight.  Six games later, his parents surrendered and he played one more game on his own. He is quite proud of his accomplishment., "I can't wait for my friends to see the stars on my bowling ball." Apparently bragging rights have been earned.

Weekend Musings

Greg and I took Ty and his buddy to Santa's Workshop Saturday morning. The boys quickly descended upon the indoor snowball fight and we were hard pressed to direct them into any of the other offered activities. When coaxed away from pelting some high school volunteers with snowballs, they found their way to the cookie walk, of course. Two steps into the scavenger hunt the little stinkers not only informed me they had decided against a photo with Santa, "because he isn't the real one" but they found the key to the scavenger hunt and filled in all the answers. They were ready to return to the snowball fight. We invited that little friend to join our family for brunch afterward and he reported he wanted to be invited again next weekend.

On Friday I made the executive decision to pick up a helium tank after finding another location waived providing balloon service. Getting Ryan's annual birthday balloons has turned into more of chore than I care to give it, so I went to Walmart. I blew out my hair and put on clean clothes after spending the morning scrubbing bathrooms. And then the cashier was wearing a shower cap. Sometimes I overestimate what is required for decent presentation.

Greg and I spent Sunday afternoon removing fallen tree limbs from the school yard. It's been a month since an ice storm took them down and apparently the work order to have the district complete the task is buried on someone's desk. It felt good to do something for the place that does so much for our son. Of course for liability reasons, this was an opportunity to do something and ask forgiveness rather than permission. I was recently accused of using this motto a little too easily as my friend was convinced Greg would forgive me for bringing home a dog from the shelter. He is a good man, but I know where that boundary line is drawn. He does in fact have limits on grace extension. A new four legged family member is exactly across that line. As it turns out, white painted furniture is sitting dangerously close as well.

This holiday season, like the fourteen prior is a mix of joy for the magic experienced through the eyes of littles and the sadness of what should have been. By God's grace, most days are heavy on the joy and light. This week holds visits from someone tiny and new while her parents move into their new home and a special lunch with my son at school. I still get to read with elementary kids on Thursdays and have a countdown running in my head at all times until Austin arrives. (8 days)

We have had opportunities to serve those less fortunate presented in unique ways; clarifying that yes, we are called to answer those requests. As each year passes, the charity we seek in honor of Ryan's birthday creeps outside bringing joy to children and now edges into the more grown up world. This year homeless gentlemen followed by two young adults. Neither were on radar until they were. God works like that in my life.

Kate is demanding a schedule for baking and Greg is running reconnaissance for this year's Christmas light scavenger hunt. Apparently we have some celebrations to squeeze into an already full month. This is the joy.

Bookcases

A lot of the Christmas decorations have been put away. That lasted eight days.  Apparently I have a low threshold for the madness this year. But once I started styling the bookcases and entertainment center, I couldn't bring myself to include additional clutter. I also reworked the mantle and am happy with the more simplified display.

I had been finished with Christmas shopping and wrapping prior to Thanksgiving but Greg and I decided one more small item was needed for one of the girls. I stood in line for 40 minutes Tuesday morning to pick it up after abandoning that same line Monday afternoon in order to meet my son's bus. The problem with this beyond the obvious is that it happened to be a line in front of a jewelry counter where I fell in love with a simple single pearl necklace. On impulse, I bought it and then asked my husband if he wanted to give it to me for Christmas. He shook his head in disbelief and declared I wasn't able to wear it before Christmas. Guess who is wrapping it too? He then asked if he could order his own Christmas gift, as if he wasn't aware I would have clearly handled that long before now. Makenna, upon hearing this exchange announced, "true love does exist."

Speaking of Makenna, she wanted homemade waffles this morning as Kate was leaving for school. She made a mock phone call to the middle school attendance line stating Kate would be late because she needed to make her breakfast. She went on to say she wanted an advance call when they planned to call me so she could record me handling the situation and then yelling at her because, "it would be funny". Somewhere along the line, I failed to scare that kid.

I met Kate with a spoon and an open container of ice cream after school Wednesday. The middle school years are tough. Fortunately, Ty was at a friend's house because she needed quiet time to process. And apparently ice cream wasn't enough because when I returned home Wednesday night from an appointment, she and Makenna were baking cookies together. Did I mention middle school was tough?

Celebrate

I received an email from his teacher this morning celebrating an achievement he has worked hard to accomplish. I love his teachers this year and their level of communication is awesome. To celebrate, we had a little painting project after school while listening to classical Christmas music; his choice.

Speaking of music, he immediately recognizes music and applies to it to where he first heard it. We heard one verse of "Why can't we be friends" on our way into a store this afternoon and he asked if it was in The Bridge to Terabithia. We watched that movie one time over a year ago. He loves music. Perhaps there is hope for one of our kids to be musically inclined? The girls are as hopeless as their mother.

Uno, bowling on the Wii and wrestling matches are consuming our evenings. Ty misses running the neighborhood with friends but it's too dark too early so we are finding cozy ways to pass time. Early bedtimes are so easily enforced this time of year, which is good for his mom too.

Not everyone gets to play though and they have some strong feelings about this. I swear Layla can pull off the most pitiful expressions. We joke she could be featured on the ASPCA commercial if it weren't for her weight.

The Weekend Review

 Mom and Dad came to town so Mom could take Kate and Ty to see the Nutcracker Ballet. They all enjoyed it. I teased that mom took two kids in exchange for Dad. He was well behaved and enjoyed video chat time with Austin that afternoon.

 

On Sunday, Amanda and I traded kids. Levi and Trevor joined us and we revisited old favorite toys, took a walk throughout the neighborhood since it was 63 degrees and painted some pictures. The energy level was high but it was good to see my little friends again. 

While I entertained little ones (or they entertained me as the case may be), Amanda and Ren took Kate and Ty ice skating. They all had a good time. Both kids can't wait to return and have friends in mind they would like to invite. But the original plan had Anna going with Kate and me keeping Ava. In the end, Ty wanted to join Kate and Anna wanted to stay with me. So a full-fledged trade occurred.  It was a fair trade.

Chalk Paint Makeover

It's the time of year I tend to get a little squirrelly. This season doesn't bring out the best in me, by any stretch of the imagination. I suspect my angst is still resonating from our Christmastime loss almost 15 years ago. I willed the world to stop turning but demands were still made and I lacked the strength at the time to firmly decline what was unreasonable while my son resided in the NICU. Christmas plans no longer mattered more than Ryan did; however, convincing family the plans we made prior to his untimely entrance into the world were not going to make the cut proved difficult at best. I still harbor some resentment 15 years later. If we can't stop long enough to acknowledge the life a baby boy in the flesh,  we are certainly failing to see the baby this entire season claims to be about.

So here I am again. It is December and my world is ready for the holidays in the increments I can handle, for as long as I can tolerate it. But I have some energy I should be using to make a difference in the world but am instead painting perfectly acceptable furniture.  Living with me is anything but easy. Greg never knows what changes he will walk into when I am restless. Friday I painted our sofa table and both end tables white in hopes of  brightening the living room I feel closing in on me. The bookcases are on Monday's agenda. Greg, ever stoic has said nothing. Ty, no where near Prince Charming status demanded to know why I changed it. He doesn't like change.

The weekend holds plans for lunch with my parents and an afternoon with my dad while my mom takes Kate and Ty to The Nutcracker Ballet. And this evening Greg and I are attending a date night at church. Tomorrow some little friends are visiting because they miss coming to my house every day. While they play, a friend is taking Kate and Ty ice skating. Given my history of two broken wrists acquired during a walk, I will politely decline any opportunity to put myself on ice. However, I am grateful for the community that loves on my kids; providing Christmastime magic when I am perhaps not feeling up to it.