We are already in the throws of back-to-school errands, paperwork and meetings. School starts in our district on the 26th and as much as I love routine, I am not ready.
We spent a few weeks stressing how to best simplify our world and knew we needed to get both kids on the same school schedule. This meant one of them was going to make a change this year. Knowing we have a supportive team caring for Ty and Kate was underwelmed with her choice last year; once she started campaigning for her base school, we consented. Despite the boost in confidence we saw last year and the cheer team she loves, she is moving. We are already seeing a few negative ramifications of that decision but in truth, both options had it's share of concerns. We doubt the bigger school (class sizes in the 500's vs 60 total in 7th grade where she was last year) will be best for either of the kids' personalities; however, they have the most resources for Ty's needs. All in all, this parenting gig isn't any easier to navigate with kids #4 and 5 as it was with the first three.
Kate is more self conscious about the larger school and has requested to wear makeup like Makenna (who wears it very infrequently) because all the girls she knows at that school wear it. At 13, I am okay with permitting it but also trying to send messages about beauty that counter the world's.
Either way, Makenna and Kate had an amazing afternoon shopping for supplies and then working together on skin care and proper application. Kate felt special and grown up hanging out with her older sister. Besides, her mother is rather clueless in this department and refuses to change that reality. I will stick with my neutral lip stain as my only cosmetic, thank you very much.
And now that Kate can stay home alone and has watched a little one for a friend, we realize she needs access to a phone. We don't love this. We had decided a flip phone with calls and texting only would suffice when we were leaning toward the smaller country school. However, in the larger school full of kids who've had smart phones since the 5th grade, the flip phone would be worse than no phone at all socially speaking. We still aren't certain what we are doing about this one. We aren't the kind of parents who care much for the Jones', much less want to keep up with them but we also know our sensitive kiddo will have enough challenges with or without the phone and makeup.We are also reaching the point where it is assumed she has a phone when she visits friends and feels uncomfortable asking a parent for access to a phone to call mom if she needs something. Borrowing a cell phone is somehow more intrusive than the old days of using the phone in the family's kitchen.
And as a side note, we do have a secret code word in our family. If anyone sends a text with only that word, we as the parent calls and orders that child home. The child is free to object and plea for more time but they will still have to come home immediately. This has helped more than one teen save face in an uncomfortable situation. So social media and access to phones doesn't have to be all negative but it is a larger responsibility than I love putting on my thirteen year old.
